Self Belief

I wrote this on November 25th, 2020, two weeks before my Khan Academy software engineer internship interview for Summer 2021. I passed it but didn’t get selected after going through the final round.

I have an exciting interview coming up in two weeks. It’s an algorithm-style interview, which usually requires two to three months of preparation.

Well, I set myself up with two weeks to prepare.

I thought about why I am in this situation. I have an interview and all of a sudden I need to drop my entire life and grind all day to prepare.

I can attribute this to a lack of discipline. I can say I was lazy. But the truth is, I didn’t believe in myself. I didn’t think I would have a chance to interview with a Big N.

The question for myself now is: what else am I not doing because I don’t believe in myself? What other areas of my life am I letting doubt creep into?

I don’t want to let fear dictate what I do and don’t do.

What if I gave it my all, but it wasn’t enough? Then I can say I did my best. And that is all I can do. I have to do my best and call it a day.

I’m writing this a week before my interview. I’ll post it after either a rejection or as a reflection after I get the job. I’m just going to wait until the process is over.

March 21, 2021

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